Back to the Swizzle Saga...To be continued 12

Swizzle Sidebar--Hey Folks. I sure have missed my man Swizzle. But he's back and strange and wonderful events are afoot in Swizzleland. If you're just tuning in, the Swizzle Saga has reached the 14,000 word mark, and we're just getting started. Click here if you want to start from the beginning. 
I'm also (as opposed to the Swizz) gearing up for an attempt to stop smoking Marlboro Reds after only 24 years. I started back in 1986 because I though it would help me get rid of the "preppie boy next door" image I thought I had. In fact, I did look like the mildly stoned, preppie boy next door, and thought smoking would make look tough. Brilliant. 
Anyhoo,  I leave for Bermuda on Monday and will be sailing up to Newport on Tuesday. The plan is to not bring any cigarettes on the 650 mile offshore passage with the hopes of jump starting my cold turkey quiting. Could be very interesting. Watch this space and Facebook for updates. 
Also, the clock is ticking as Swizzle needs to be back for a kinda televised MARS gig at the Belmont Community TV studios on Friday night. It's gonna be close. Sounds a little bit like a movie that's playing in theaters near you. Stay tuned. In the meantime, here's the next installment of the To be Continueds.

So……

Everyone turned to Wayne. He slowly put his arm down, “Ummm, battery’s no good,” he said. Gene’s eyes narrowed and the boys really didn’t know what to make of Wayne’s little comment.

Turns out, it’s no big deal that ol’ Wayne here had something to say. His bad teeth, bad skin and filthy clothes make him look like dim-witted scumbag , but in reality, ol Wayne is not only smart, he’s actually kinda…..sweet. Gene had told him to keep quiet about the bad battery, but he didn’t want those boys to drive off not knowing that they might not be able to start the car again if they turned it off.

“Wa da ya mean,” asked Angel.

“Battery’s totally dead,” said Wayne. “Had to jump it to get it going.”

“Well, this changes things a bit, doesn’t it Gene?” said Ebony.

“I guess,” said Gene glaring at Wayne.

“We’ll give you $200,” said the master negotiator.

Wayne just smiled his brown, broken tooth smile.

“Deal,” was all Gene could say.

So that was that. The day that started in the wee hours by flying in a VW Dasher over a dry river bed in the Utah desert, had progressed to the point where these California-bound college boys were driving a hard bargain with a psudo-sherrif cowboy of a two trailer town for a 1980 Chevy Monza that they couldn’t turn off. Exactly 20 hours had passed since the Swizz had been hijacked by Angel and Ebony; they’ve been busy. But at least now they’ll be able to get themselves, and all their crap, back to Boulder.

“Let’s pack up and get outta here,” said Ebony.

“Yea,” said the Swizz. “If jerk-face here can stay awake and avoid jumping any more ravines, we’ll be back on the porch eating cheese dogs sometime tonight.”

The four of them were standing in a circle. The car doors were open and the road-warrior-rigged engine they couldn’t urn off was just chugging along. The sun was pretty high in the sky now. It was hot, but it was a “dry heat.” Ebony was thinking: “There’s no way we’re gonna fit all this stuff in this stupid little white car.” The Swizz was just happy they were going home, and that Gene had finally left them alone and gone back to actively holding Eunice and her smushed-up cleavage hostage. The sad thing was, he wasn’t really thinking about Eunice or even her intoxicatingly jiggly cleavage. All he wanted to do was smoke some of Ebony’s weed once they got back on the road. They couldn’t do that with the heavily belt-buckled sheriff in their midst. He really needed some deep pulls from that pocket-sized deer antler pipe, and he knew once they got back into road-mode, the pipe would be passed. That’s all he really cared about.

“Uh, boys,” said Angel in his somewhat high-pitched, California accent. “We’re almost halfway there. I say we keep going.” In retrospect, it’s obvious that as soon as they realized they were gonna buy the Monza, Angel knew they were going to keep going. He just needed to convince the others.

“Are you fucking crazy,” said Ebony. “After all we’ve been through, ALL YOU’VE PUT US THROUGH, you want to keep driving away from home. HELLO! Einstein, we can’t turn the car off. What do you want us to do, leave it running for a couple days while we’re in Yosemite? What about San Francisco? I’m sure it’ll be no problem to just keep it running in the Height. Look that the car for God’s sake. We’ll be lucky if it even gets us out of this fucking gas station.”
Who could blame ebony for this little outburst? A crazy, California climber/skateboard dude has crashed his car. He’s called his trust fund manager and his insurance agent back east so they could buy this stupid car that’ll get them, and all their crap, back to town, and now this crazy dude wants to keep going. “Man, why do I always have to be the responsible one?” he ruefully thought to himself.

The Swizz just listened, thinking about getting high.

“No, man, wait, why not? We can totally keep going. Come on. It’ll be fun. We’re almost there.”
“What about the car?” Ebony posited. “We can’t turn it off.”

“Sure we can,” Angel replied.

“Come on, where’s your sense of adventure?” Angel said with that demonic smile he always gets before convincing the boys to do something they’re positive they’ll regret but end up talking about years later. “We can jump it. Like, get it rolling, pop it in gear, and away we go. It’ll be as easy as parking on a hill. Come on. Nothing’s going on back in Boulder. Do you want to spend yet another night drinking beers and eating cheese dogs on the porch?”

“Yea, I do,” said the Swizz.

“No, man, come on. It’s no big deal. Let’s keep going. You’ve never been to Yosemite or even California for cripes sake. You don’t even know what you’ll be missing.”

“Well…..,” said Swizz. “Wa da ya think E?”

“Why do I hang out with you idiots?” was all he could say. “Stair rolls, roof jumping, and now this. Errr…...”

“Come on man,” Angel implored. “Let’s go.”

“I’m in,” said the Swizz.

Angel was always able to sway the Swizz. It didn’t take much. This is probably because Swizzle was always on the edge in his mind, even though it didn’t always appear that way. The fact that Angel’s edge was a little further out than Swizzle’s, and he was more confident navigating the footing out there, always made it easier for Swizzle to make the jump. Ebony always took a little more reasoning.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” said Ebony. “Okay, now, yea, I could maybe keep going, but……” he said. The idea didn’t seem all that impossible all of a sudden. It still seemed crazy, but in a memorable kind of way that’s only possible when you’re young and everything is possible. “Let’s at least see if we can do a roll start.”

“Yea, man, now you’re talking,” said Angel. He slid behind the wheel and turned the car off………………